Charles Battell Loomis

Charles Battell Loomis was an American author and humorist born on January 16, 1861 in Brooklyn, New York. He is best known for his humorous works that often featured witty social commentary. Loomis wrote extensively for magazines and newspapers, creating a significant body of work that included books such as 'Cheerful Americans' and 'I've Been Thinking.' He passed away on September 23, 1911.

January 16, 1861

September 23, 1911

English

Propinquity Needed

Celestine Silvousplait Justine de Mouton Rosalie,
A coryphée who lived and danced in naughty, gay Paree,
Was every bit as pretty as a French girl e'er can be
                    (Which isn't saying much).

Maurice Boulanger (there's a name that would adorn a king),
But Morris Baker was the name they called the man I sing.
He lived in New York City in the Street that's labeled Spring
                    (Chosen because it rhymed).

Now Baker was a lonesome youth and wanted to be wed,
And for a wife, all over town he hunted, it is said;
And up and down Fifth Avenue he ofttimes wanderéd
                    (He was a peripatetic Baker, he was).

And had he met Celestine, not a doubt but Cupid's darts
Would in a trice have wounded both of their fond, loving hearts;...

Charles Battell Loomis