Albert Bigelow Paine

Albert Bigelow Paine was an American author best known for his work as a biographer, notably for his three-volume biography of Mark Twain. Born in New Bedford, Massachusetts, he wrote fiction, humor, and travel books. His writing captured the essence of American life during his time, and his biography of Twain remains a critical resource for understanding the famous author. Paine also ventured into children's literature, reflecting his versatile talent in various literary forms.

July 10, 1861

April 9, 1937

English

Mis' Smith

All day she hurried to get through,
The same as lots of wimmin do;
Sometimes at night her husban' said,
"Ma, ain't you goin' to come to bed?"
And then she'd kinder give a hitch,
And pause half way between a stitch,
And sorter sigh, and say that she
    Was ready as she'd ever be,
        She reckoned.

And so the years went one by one,
An' somehow she was never done;
An' when the angel said, as how
"Mis' Smith, it's time you rested now,"
She sorter raised her eyes to look
A second, as a stitch she took;
"All right, I'm comin' now," says she,
"I'm ready as I'll ever be,
        I reckon."

Albert Bigelow Paine

Sary "Fixes Up" Things

Oh, yes, we've be'n fixin' up some sence we sold that piece o' groun'
Fer a place to put a golf-lynx to them crazy dudes from town.
(Anyway, they laughed like crazy when I had it specified,
Ef they put a golf-lynx on it, thet they'd haf to keep him tied.)
But they paid the price all reg'lar, an' then Sary says to me,
"Now we're goin' to fix the parlor up, an' settin'-room," says she.
Fer she 'lowed she'd been a-scrimpin' an' a-scrapin' all her life,
An' she meant fer once to have things good as Cousin Ed'ard's wife.

Well, we went down to the city, an' she bought the blamedest mess;
An' them clerks there must 'a' took her fer a' Astoroid, I guess;
Fer they showed her fancy bureaus which they said was shiffoneers,
An' some more they said was dressers, an' some curtains called port...

Albert Bigelow Paine